Valhalla on Earth

It is regrettable that anyone has to die, ever. People seem to love and care for other people, unless those other people are foreigners, believe different things, have alternate life styles or live in gross and disgusting sin. Then people hate people and people kill people. Then people die and the people who die are missed by people who love them. People who kill people have people who love them. People who die at the hands of other people have people who love them. People who love people and kill other people are people nonetheless and should be thought of no less than any other person. The person who dies at the hands of another person is a person too. So how can a person who loves and is loved by people kill another person who loves and is loved by other people?

2000 American soldiers dead in Iraq. 2K. That is regrettable. These soldiers had friends and family that loved them and will miss them. But these soldiers were part of the American Armed Forces whose job it is to risk their lives. It is still sad. But these soldiers also killed, maimed and threatened the lives of others who were doing what they thought to be a good and honourable goal. It is, in my opinion, not right that any person should kill another person. I wish the war would end. I wish. I wish.

President Bush has a sure-fire way to bring about the end of this war and it does not involve putting them putting their pansy-ass tails between their legs. The solution: MORE RESOLVE.

That is right. Resolve. But what does “resolve” mean?

1. decide: bring to an end; settle conclusively
2. conclude: reach a conclusion after a discussion or deliberation
3. purpose: reach a decision; “he resolved never to drink again”
4. answer: understand the meaning of; “The question concerning the meaning of life cannot be answered”
5. make clearly visible; “can this image be resolved?”
6. find the solution; “solve an equation”; “solve for x”
7. resoluteness: the trait of being resolute; “his resoluteness carried him through the battle”; “it was his unshakable resolution to finish the work”

So, to bring the war to an end the US needs to settle it conclusively. Or it needs to make the war clearly visible. Or to find the solution. But my money is on 7. Good ol’ lucky number 7. Bush wants the US to stand fast and be unshakable. Like a lamb to the slaughter. Like Jesus to the Cross.

I figure that Bush is actually onto something here. If the US stops immigration because it is scared of outsiders (I hear Bush has the new “Prussian Blue” album on his Ipod and his favourite song is Aryan Man Awake) then the population would only grow as per natural means. With the whole “No-Sex is Good Sex” campaign going on then the population would be set at a fixed number.

With the US population not growing, and more people being sent to die in Iraq it appears that the number of people left to mourn would be shrinking. This also means that the resolve of the American people would be more concentrated and ready to explode on the World like a teenager’s pimple face on a mirror. This is a brilliant plan. But it demonstrates a lack of fore-thought.

Bush is pro-Intelligent design but what he is practicing here is Darwinism. The weak and stupid are being killed off in Iraq. The poor and the elderly are dieing due to supposed “Acts of God.” The rest of the poor and elderly are dieing due to the cost of prescription drugs. Bush is building an uber-mensche race ready to conquer the world as soon as the resolve of the American people has reached capacity.

Rumour has it that Bush and Cheney have constructed a thermometer of sorts which indicates the level of resolve of the American people. Also, according to an anonymous source, it appears that there is an White House collection to help pay for Ms Rice’s surgery. Apparently they are wanting the same surgeon that turned Michael Jackson white. Supposedly the unnamed doctor has fixed the procedure to prevent the side-effects of child molestation and denial that plagued the world’s most famous white African-American.